butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize