Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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