What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
