I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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