we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
