I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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