Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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