As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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