Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Randomize
