you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Randomize