this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i already hear my dad disowning me
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
