but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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