I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
