He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Randomize
