I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
