and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
