Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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