What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
