if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
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