i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
