I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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