Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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