Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
My underwear smells like fireworks.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
