i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
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