fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Randomize
