When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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