please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
