We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
