he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
