I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
