i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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