If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Randomize
