i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize