I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
