On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
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