She's JV to your varsity
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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