Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
