Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I need moral support for this bender
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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