I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
