Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
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