Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
