Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
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