omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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