All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I'm passing your future prison.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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