i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize
