just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
