I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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