I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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