Walk of Shame. In a state park.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
