I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize