This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
